When Did Things Go Wrong?

"How are you, baby?"

"I'm good."

"No, you're not."

"Hm?"

"Onika, I know when something's wrong. You can tell me."

"I don't want to talk about it right now, ma."

"Okay, but remember you can always call me."

"I know."

"Alright, baby. I love you."

"I love you, too."

"Call me later."

"I will."

Nicki hung up the phone and sighed. Just then she heard footsteps coming up her stairs and a smile grew across her face. Candi and TT walked into her room and her smile grew even bigger.

"How did you guys get in here?"

"Oh, you left the front door unlocked."

Candi and TT walked around and sat on the opposite side of Nicki on the bed.

"Still depressed?"

Nicki glared at both TT and Candi before she grabbed up her phone and stood up off the bed.

"I'm fine."

"You're not. How could you be?" TT said.

Nicki placed her phone down on her dresser and began looking around.

"Where the fuck is that charger?"

"Nope. She's not." Candi said. Nicki stopped in her tracks and glared over at Candi before continuing to look around her room.

"Have you guys seen my charger?"

"We just got here." Candi said.

"And you can just leave too." Nicki said looking back at Candi with a sarcastic smile. TT laughed and got comfortable sitting on Nicki's bed. Candi rolled her eyes and waved Nicki off.

"We're not here to give our opinion. We're just here for support."

"Really? The one time I need you guys to tell me if what I did was right, you guys don't want to give your opinion?" Nicki said as she bent down finding her charger in the corner of her room right before you enter her closet. She picked it up and turned around to them.

"If you think what you did was right then it was right." TT said.

"And if you think it's wrong..." Candi said before cutting her sentence off shortly.

"Whatever. You guys are useless."

Nicki grabbed her phone off the dresser and walked over towards the socket in the wall.

"Has he came and got his stuff yet?" TT asked.

"Mhmmm." Nicki bent down plugging the charger into the wall and plugged the charger up to her phone. She stood up and laid her phone down on her nightstand.

"Well...did you talk to him?"

"You mean did he talk to me?" Nicki walked over to the corner of her room and took a seat in her chair. She reclined it back just a little and leaned her head back against it.

"You guys are so stubborn." TT said.

"Fuck him."

"Just difficult." Candi said.

"Whatever. Instead of being mature about it he wants to ignore me and act like that so whatever. He's gone. I don't have to see him."

"This is crazy." Candi said rolling her eyes and shaking her head.

"Never thought this day would come." TT said.

"Yeah, well..." Nicki started but drifted off getting caught in the memory.

"I'm tired of having this fucking argument with you!"

"You don't have to. You keep yelling and shit. It's not gon change nothing."

"Well that's fucking ridiculous and sad. You don't even fucking care, it's just sick." Nicki said holding her hand up to him and looking away shaking her head trying to prevent the tears that she felt were on the verge of breaking into a flood. 

"I do care. I care a lot."

"You don't show it." Nicki spat back.

"You don't show it either."

"How the fuck is this always being turned back on me? We are BOTH wrong here. I'm so sick of this shit."

 "I'm sick of it too." 

Nicki felt herself raging with anger at how calm SB was appearing to be. Actions speak louder than words and right now... they're saying he doesn't care. But for SB, that's not true. He's devastated. Seriously. But showing it isn't going to do much for him or work in his favor. He didn't want to keep pretending with Nicki. They both know they're hurting. They both know things aren't right. The littlest things have been blown up into such situations and they're causing everything to fall apart. And that's exactly what's happening right before their eyes... everything is falling apart. 

"So you're putting this over me?"

"How am I doing that? I'm still here."

"SB. Let's not play fucking stupid alright?! You haven't been around lately at all. What the fuck are you talking about? You would rather be doing your own thing than being with me. So that's showing you care?"

"You treat me like I'm invisible anyways, what you need me for?"

Nicki grunted and rolled her eyes getting even more angry. 

"Don't fucking-"

"Yo, you need to chill, forreal." SB said standing up finally letting his attitude show. "This shit is ridiculous."

"It is, huh?" Nicki laughed and walked back and forth trying to calm herself. 

"You think we both putting this shit over each other, that's the problem." SB said smacking his hand in his other hand. "But let's be real about this shit."

"Now you wanna be real about this shit? Don't give me that fucking attitude, Safaree!"

"Nah, you wanted to keep arguing so let's do it."

"Let's do it." Nicki said with anger. 

"This argument of me not being there for you is getting tired." Safaree said turning to walk out the door. 

"You're NOT there for me!" Nicki said shouting and following behind him."Where the fuck have you been the past few days? No, the past few months! Huh? Not here with me!"

SB sighed shaking his head and continued walking towards his room. He walked into his closet and grabbed a duffle and began throwing random clothes in it. 

"Leaving again. What a fucking surprise!" Nicki threw her hands up. "You keep showing you don't give a fuck about me anymore."

"You show you don't give a fuck anymore either." SB said turning and walking right passed her and out of his closet and into his bathroom.  "You're making this shit bigger than what it is." SB grabbed his toothbrush and tossed it into his duffle.

"How?! Huh?!"

"You let this nigga talk you into firing me." SB said with a chuckle. "This that shit that everybody was talking about when they said he can't be trusted."

"SB, don't act like I haven't said that before. I've always said I was going to but still have you around. Now that it actually happened you want to leave me?!"

"What's the point of me being around?" SB walked passed her again out of the bathroom door and back into his room. He tossed the bag on the bed and walked over to his shoes that were lying in the corner of his room. He picked them up and sat in the chair. "You don't need me for shit, anyways. It's all about Nicki." he said as he put on his shoes. 

"Is that why you're trying to do your own thing so you don't have to be tied in with me anymore?"

SB ignored Nicki's talking and continue putting on his shoes.

"Answer me!"

He continued ignoring her. Nicki stomped over to the bed and grabbed his duffle. 

"You're not getting this until you fucking answer me."

SB stood up and grabbed his jacket off the bed and put it on. Nicki stared at him with rage and Safaree adjusted his hat. He put on his sunglasses and turned to face Nicki who now had tears running down her face at a rapid pace. In all honesty, his heart broke seeing that Nicki was broken right in front of his eyes. But he was fed up. He was sick and tired. Nothing was the same. 

What happened? What changed? WHEN did things change? How did things get this far? They've always had their moments and they bounce back from them but this was different, no this way COMPLETELY different. The feeling of somewhat resentment and anger they had towards each other was now becoming crystal clear and it scared both of them. It's been building up and building up.

Nicki didn't want to fire SB. Why would she? But she saw the way things were headed business wise which was interfering with her personal and she didn't need it. So she thought it was the best move when Manny suggested it. She still wanted SB around regularly just like he was before, she didn't know that when she told him she wanted to let him go that that would be the breaking point that caused all of this. 

And now... it was too late. SB felt like he was in a never ending boxing match that he could not win. He was restless and tired. Everything was affecting him though he didn't choose to show it. He cared. He still cares. More than Nicki or anyone could ever know. But right now in this moment, he was done. He had to hang up his boxing gloves and go. 

"So you're done?" Nicki said lowly with tears. He sighed and grabbed the bag out of her hands that she didn't even have enough strength to put up a fight with. He ignored her and turned to walk out of his room and Nicki on his heels.

"You're really done?! You always give up on me, always."

"Shit, I been trying for 13 years with you." he said walking down the steps. Nicki stared at his back following behind him as the tears continued to fall. "13 years for nothing I guess." They made it to the bottom of the stairs and SB continued walking, never stopping until he hit the front door and heard Nicki's voice.

"You're throwing away 13 years over this?!"

"Nah, YOU threw away 13 years, Nic. You did that the moment you chose all this fame shit over me. The passed few months you haven't paid me any attention. As soon as I do stuff for myself and I'm not around anymore, I'm selfish."

Even more so, SB felt like he has been trying for years, months, weeks, days and Nicki never once tried with him. He felt like he since he's been doing all the work, now it's time to see. Now it's time to see who cares for who more. He felt like Nicki knew this was coming, he knew it was coming, everyone knew it was coming. The problems were obvious. But did Nicki ever try? No. When he tried to talk to her about it did she care? No. She brushed it off. Just like she's been doing to him since things have been getting rockier. Brush it off and act happy. So why should he care when she doesn't?

"Safaree, it's not about you wanting to do your own shit! Stop saying that!" Nicki said now shouting. "You're doing all this cause you want my attention?" 

SB threw his head back finding himself angry for arguing with her now. 

"I know it's not. It's about you being all about work. You being all about business. You being all about yourself. You didn't give a fuck about me until I went away. It's not about your damn attention either. It's about you not caring."

"That's not true." Nicki said as she wiped at her face. 

"It is. You put everything before me, so chill out. You don't even want me around because you really want me around. Only for you. Everything for you. I hope this shit goes perfect for you now that I'm out of the way." Before he could even grab the doorknob he stopped hearing Nicki's voice again.

"How did we get here?" Nicki said through heavy breathing and tears.  

"I told you. When you chose business over your "family." He said right before he opened the door and walked out.

"I just have a question, and then you can shut me up and get angry or whatever you want..." Candi said.

Nicki sighed. "Say it."

"Do you still love him?"

"Of course."

"So what's the problem?"

"Everything. Every little thing, every big thing."

"It really is true what they say..." Candi said.

"What?" Nicki and TT said at the same time.

"No matter how good you think you are, or you think things are between you and your loved ones, fame will always test that."

"It just doesn't make sense." TT said. "13 years. 13 years. THIRTEEN. You're just going to let it go like that?" she snapped. "Just like that?"

"He let it go, too."

"But he tried to fix things. You told us that. And you ignored it and wanted to continue being mad about it."

Nicki sighed deeply and wiped at a tear that she wondered when the hell go there.

Nicki grabbed her phone and braced herself opening the message from SB. 

I'm having a show if u wanna come...

I don't. Good luck with it.

Wow...

What?

I was right.

Right about what?

You really don't care. Ha...

I have other things to do, SB. I'm a busy person, you know that. 

But you're gonna be in NY at the same time working on Brinx's mixtape...but you got other things to do. Aight

Nicki ignored his messaged and tossed her phone in the corner of the room. 

"Don't cry, Nic. Forreal." Candi said.

"We're trying to help." TT said.

"I know." Nicki said as she wiped at her face. "Everything's just falling apart."

"If you want things to get better than you have to fix it. I don't care what Manny says, I don't care what your fans say, and I don't care what the media says. If you feel like you made the wrong decision letting SB go then you need to fix it." Candi said.

"Nicki not only did you lose your hypeman, you lost your best friend. I mean your BEST friend. Not only your hypeman and best friend but your boyfriend. Fix it." TT said.

"You guys just don't get it."

  Candi and TT sighed feeling like they were getting nowhere.

"Fine. We're gonna stay out of it but you really need to think about it." TT said.

"When all this fame and shit goes away... remember who was there for you from the beginning and wasn't trying to use you to get where they want to be."